We grow through what we go through.

Acne, Back Acne (‘Bacne’), black heads, white heads, hyperpigmentation, heat rash… to name a few, I experienced all of these and some I still do now at my big age of 30 years old.

As soon as I started puberty aged 10 going on 11, I had “bad skin”. It was very oily, and the acne was vicious. I could never anticipate how awful it would be, not just the appearance but the effects on my emotional and mental wellbeing was immense.

Teenagers can be mean!

Name calling/ comments were rife – ‘pizza face’… “your skin looks disgusting” …and the list goes on. To my face, behind my back, he said... she said, it was all verbal, nonetheless. It got to me, but I didn’t say anything, I didn’t say much to anyone about the bullying not just the verbal kind but the other types which I’ll express another time.

I spent many years going through trial and error with multiple products - they never worked. At a young age I was conscious of the things I was eating (apart from the infamous cheap and cheerful chicken and chips). At one point I was consistently eating pomegranate and drinking Evian water every day, specifically at break time. My friends thought I was weird, but I didn’t care as I was doing it for me and subconsciously I probably knew it was about my skin, but I enjoyed my healthy regime. 

Even with all the consumption of water there wasn’t much improvement. After using various products, I tried recommendations from pharmacist – honestly nothing worked! At this point I was well into my teenage years, and I decided to see my GP and then I got a referral to see a dermatologist. Following my referral, I started a trial of antibiotics and the use of salicylic acid. I know it doesn’t sound like something you should be putting on your skin. I felt like the antibiotics did okay in the short term, but it wasn’t ideal and salicylic acid did what it was supposed to do but it was very unpleasant and quite abrasive. It even stained my pillowcases, and it looked like bleach got onto them.

On another occasion I went to the GP for my hyperpigmentation. I was prescribed a wash and cream. All these changes and products to keep up with, it was too much. I wasn’t consistent enough – having to deal with something new again and wanting things to change instantly because of how long I was going through this. It was very overwhelming. 

When I was younger, I didn’t particularly enjoy summertime. I had a few insecurities, but it seemed like summer magnified these insecurities or what I deemed to be as flaws. It didn’t take much heat for my skin to react, I already had acne and on top of that, I would sweat a lot. Hence why I didn’t like summer much, amongst other things.

Unfortunately, I spent many years still trying to find something that worked, mainly for my acne. Given that it was on my face, and this was my main concern as this is what people could see, also my back but that was easier to cover up. 

Eventually I grew out of the acne and my skin started clearing up. I still battle from time to time with breakouts and insecurities rise but I don’t let it consume me. 

‘We grow through what we go through.’

This is the key, even though I’ve used my experience of my “so-called” bad skin and skin care journey - the effects were beyond skin-deep. To me it wasn’t superficial as it affected me psychologically. We all go through things in life and unfortunately, we can’t change what happened, but we can control how it affects us and how we respond.

It’s true that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and ultimately you shouldn’t have seek for validation outside of yourself.

Your truth is your superpower, so set yourself free!

Love and light,

Naomi Rae x